Brandon, my older boyfriend, and I had been dating for several months. In those months, I was at my most happiest I had ever been. My school-life and work-life had been going great and even though I had a hectic schedule, Brandon and I managed to find time to see one another. We developed a routine of seeing each other every Wednesday night, which became the one and only day out of the week in which we were able to be together intimately.
Whenever we saw each other at work by coincidence or by Brandon’s own orchestrations, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. Pent-up sexual wants and needs drove us and at one point, we even used one of the back offices at my work for a quickie. It was hot and filled with the adrenaline of possibly getting caught at any minute.
The rush and newness of our May-December relationship never faded. However, as much as I wished that Brandon’s faith and devotion to Christianity wasn’t a big deal, it was. And the longer I tried to shrug it off, the more I was becoming aware that at some point, we needed to discuss it.
One Wednesday night, Brandon asked if I wouldn’t mind going to church with him. I, of course, did not have a problem with it. Just because I wasn’t a Christian woman, it did not mean that I did not respect my boyfriend’s beliefs. I wanted to meet Brandon halfway and I did, but on that particular Wednesday, there was a tone in Brandon’s usual jovial voice that made me realize that the time for “the talk” had come.
As usual, I got ready during the 30 minutes that it took Brandon to get to my house. I kept thinking how I was going to phrase my thoughts to him if he were to ask me anything about our standpoints on religious views. At best, I was easily described as Agnostic, maybe even a little borderline Atheist, even though as a child I was raised with a Catholic background.
In the first few weeks that Brandon and I had started dating, we were open with each other about our viewpoints in life. I knew Brandon had been hurt in the past and that there was a slight cynicism in him towards women. He was very cautious with his feelings and even though he was open, honest, and very affectionate with me, there was always something that I felt was off. In the beginning, it started off with comments such as, “Oh, you’re just like every girl then,” when I mentioned my favorite color. It eventually built up to things like, “Women are just snakes and they spin their webs to catch you.”
When I first heard Brandon say these kinds of things, I didn’t pay them any mind; I just laughed and followed it by saying, “And right there is typical male thinking.” And we would laugh and continue on with whatever we were doing. But this particular day, Brandon said something to me that was the last thing I’d never imagine coming from the sweet, fun-loving guy I was calling my boyfriend…