When I woke up, Derrick was still lying next to me. I turned to face him and realized that he was actually awake—he was just lying there watching me. “I’ve missed you, Cassie.” My heart melted with his words. I felt whole again. I hadn’t realized how much I missed this man. In all honesty, I thought I had moved on, but having reconnected with him like this made me remember why I loved him so much.
We spent the entire day in bed together. We didn’t speak much—just stared at each other, and made love over and over again. I was mesmerized by his presence. Once upon a time, I was the one who was bringing youth and vitality to his life, but in that moment, I felt like he was the one who was reviving me.
The next day, Derrick and I took care of business—we discussed the events that had unfolded months before. This time, I was completely and utterly honest. I told him the real reason why Mrs. Friedman broke my window, I confessed about when and why I started dating Josh, and I told him all about the pictures that his wife had threatened me with. He was silent for most of the conversation, so I couldn’t tell if he was sad or angry.
After a few minutes of silence, he finally spoke, and he was honest too. He told me his side of the story and ended by saying that he had filed for divorce three months ago, and that he was trying to situate everything. He was willing to risk it all for me.
I was paralyzed by his words. At that moment, Josh’s face ran through my mind—my sincere, loving, innocent Josh who was caught in a web of lies and infidelity. I discussed my concerns about our affair with Derrick, and we decided to continue seeing each other secretly until his divorce was final—it was in everyone’s best interests.
This time around, I called the shots. Derrick was now my “mistress.” I enjoyed the sense of power I had, and definitely enjoyed having both men in my life.
As part of my many lies, I told Josh that he could no longer spend every night with me because my father would be moving in and that he did not approve of us being together under the same roof.
Looking back, what I did was incredibly selfish and evil. Oftentimes, Derrick would come to the house when Josh was there. He would shake hands with Josh, converse in small talk, and then excuse himself to our bed. Josh would always make jokes about my “father.” Sometimes I felt guilty, but more often than not, I just felt happy. I was literally having the best of both worlds.
When I needed to experience the youthful night life, I went out with Josh. And when I wanted to go someplace expensive or needed a new handbag, I went out with Derrick. The old man didn’t mind this arrangement because, after all, he had a similar relationship with this wife.
At the end of the day, everyone was getting what they wanted. For once in my life, I comprehended what Mrs. Friedman was trying to do. She too had the best of both worlds at one time. Now it was my turn.