QUESTION: I’ve been dating an older guy for about three months now. He’s gorgeous, incredibly sweet, and I really love being with him, but I have yet to introduce him to my best friend. She’s really conservative and I’m scared she won’t get why I’m with him. She knows I’m in a relationship, but not that it’s a May-December relationship. What’s the best way to tell her about my older man?
CHELSEA SAYS: I understand that she’s your best friend, but you need to stop paying so much attention to what she will think of you and your May-December relationship. If you really do like him and you want to keep dating him despite the age difference, it shouldn’t matter what she thinks. Here’s what it boils down to—you should want to show off your gorgeous older man, not hide him away. If you’re embarrassed to be with him, then you shouldn’t have started dating him in the first place.
If you want to keep both your friendship and your May-December relationship, then you need to tell her what’s going on. Sit her down and start by telling her about this amazing man you met. Tell her about his great personality, how he treats you like a queen, how happy you are, and that you see that there’s serious potential with him—tell her how you honestly feel. But make sure that you talk about him the way you would any other man. Be authentic and real, and let the age difference come out naturally. If his age is the first thing that comes up when talking about your older man, then it clearly means more to you than you’re letting on. If that’s the case, perhaps you need to re-address how committed you are to being in a May-December relationship.
Remember, if you’re authentic in the way that you tell her about your May-December relationship, her response will be authentic in return. If you sugar coat it or beat around the bush, you won’t know how she really feels.
If she’s really your best friend, she’ll be more concerned with how happy he makes you than how old he is. In all honesty, if she’s too conventional to accept your May-December relationship and that your taste in men is different from hers, then I say it’s time to start looking for new friends.