How to Bring a Girl Home When You Live with Your Parents

Bring a Girl HomeIn this econ­omy, it’s becom­ing more and more evi­dent that peo­ple are mov­ing out of their par­ents’ house much later than before. That means you still have to deal with the nag­ging, the com­plain­ing, the rules, and no pri­vacy. The first few issues can be tol­er­ated, but the pri­vacy aspect can really get annoy­ing, espe­cially when it comes to dat­ing. This then begs the ques­tion, how do you bring a girl home when you still live with your parents?

So let’s say you’re out with the guys on a Sat­ur­day night, you’ve had a few drinks, and you spot this gor­geous girl across the bar. You head over with all the con­fi­dence in the world and buy her a drink. One thing leads to another and you find your tongue down her throat; need­less to say, things are look­ing good. And then she asks that beau­ti­ful question—“Can we go back to your place?” Your answer is extremely cru­cial, because it will make or break your chances with this woman. So what do you do?

1. Tell her it’s your place. Just say, “Of course we can go back to my place.” It tech­ni­cally is your place, too, so you haven’t lied about any­thing yet. Then on the way to your house, tell her that your par­ents are stay­ing with you for a while, just because they’re get­ting older and you want to be able to help them out. This is one of the safest lies you can tell. She’ll eat all that sen­si­tiv­ity up and it’ll make your night even better.

2. Take Her Down­stairs: This one will only work if you’re com­ing back to the house really late. Chances are your room is upstairs along with your mom and dad’s, so rock­ing the sheets might actu­ally wake them up and make for a really awk­ward moment. Take her to the base­ment; if there’s a couch down there, even bet­ter. If there isn’t, tell her you love spon­ta­neous sex and want to take her right there and then. You don’t even have to men­tion the parents.

3. Cook a nice meal for her: Noth­ing will impress a woman more than a man who knows his way around the kitchen. If you can pre­pare an amaz­ing meal just for her, she’ll be more will­ing to look past the fact that mommy still does your laun­dry and makes your lunch. In fact, if you’re lucky, she might actu­ally take you right there at the din­ner table.

4. Dodge the ques­tion. Pull the spon­ta­neous card again. Tell her you’d rather do some­thing crazy, like sex in a secluded park or the back­seat of your car. Bet­ter yet, con­vince her that you two should go back to her place and bone.

5. Just be hon­est. The truth is going to come out even­tu­ally, espe­cially if this becomes a reg­u­lar thing. Ratio­nal­ize it to her, tell her it’s tem­po­rary, and explain to her that there are five bed­rooms in the house and you would hate for them to go to waste. If she’s still not buy­ing it, come up with a sob story about how you need to take care of your father or mother and explain to her that it’s hard to show peo­ple your soft, sen­si­tive side—even bet­ter if you can throw in some alli­ga­tor tears. Before you know it, she’ll be melt­ing in your arms and both of you are on the way back to your house.

6. For­get the par­ents. This one takes a lit­tle balls. Just take her and home and go at it. If your par­ents know what (or who) you’re doing, there’s a good chance they’re not going to walk in on it. So have a good time and deal with it in the morn­ing. How­ever, this prob­a­bly isn’t the best move if you gen­uinely like this girl and see long-term poten­tial with her.

7. Ask her to stay with you. Fol­low­ing my pre­vi­ous point, this is a tip bet­ter suited to more seri­ous rela­tion­ships. It’s a long shot and could cre­ate prob­lems down the road, but it’s worth a shot if you really want to keep her around. Tell her to move her stuff in—you’re not going to be liv­ing there for­ever, so you both may as well take advan­tage of your par­ents’ gen­eros­ity while you can. If things are get­ting seri­ous, keep remind­ing her that the faster you both save money by liv­ing at home, the faster you can move out and get your own place.

Liv­ing with mom and dad can’t be that bad, what with the free rent, laun­dry, and food—sometimes the deal is just too sweet to pass up. We all have our pride and want big­ger things for our­selves, but we know a free ride when we see one. And if you play it smart, your sex life doesn’t have to suf­fer because of it.

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About Francine K

I first met Alfred when I was 38 and he was 63, on an Internet chat site. I really didn't think this was a datable person, but a wonderful friendship developed. We became chat buddies for a while and connected so well on so many levels, we decided to meet in person. We live 100 miles apart, but that has never gotten in the way of us spending time together. A passionate relationship soon grew, and oh what an amazing lover. I had some reservations about getting too involved: our age difference is 25 years, and we are in different phases in our lives; in fact he has a daughter who is older than I am. I have 2 teenage sons, a career, was building my first home, and he’s retired, owns his home, lives alone, takes a nap during the day, and enjoys a slow-paced lifestyle. I am still ambitious and will soon have the empty nest to go start my own life, as my sons are nearly independent. There is no way I want to sit down and have a retired lifestyle yet. We’ve shared a beautiful, passionate friendship for many years together. We’ve never really figured out how to plan a future together, though.