How to Get the Truth Out of Your Man About His “Other Woman:” Part 2

Kee­gan dropped the big bomb­shell. “This other woman did man­age to get me in bed with her, but I couldn’t get it up. She wasn’t who I wanted, and I am sorry.”

He paused briefly before tak­ing another step. “She started mak­ing threats. I was con­cerned she would try hurt­ing her­self or, even worse, hurt­ing you. So I did what I thought was right, con­sid­er­ing the sit­u­a­tion. I wanted to let her down on a high note, and by that I mean I couldn’t just dis­ap­pear or I firmly believed she would have hurt her­self or some­one else. I talked her into get­ting some help, and then tried to delete the damn pro­file, but I couldn’t fig­ure out how. She kept mes­sag­ing me, so I called the 1–800 num­ber to have cus­tomer ser­vice do it for me.”

He handed me a folder of con­ver­sa­tions he’d printed out. “I kept all of the records, just in case some­thing came of it, and I wanted to show you so you knew it wasn’t because I didn’t want to be with you exclu­sively. I want to be your hus­band some­day, I want to have chil­dren with you, but before we could get there, I needed to pro­tect you and myself. So you see, my dear, you’re the one who insulted me,” he said, chuck­ling as he watched the expres­sion on my face change from anger to shock.

Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you con­fide in me? Why didn’t you come to me for help like you should have? Isn’t that what I’m here for, for you? So here we are, both relieved and a bit angry, but clearly want­ing the same things with each other. Why is it so hard for us to make this hap­pen when we both want it?” I asked as I hugged him closely. I wanted to believe his story, but part of me wasn’t buy­ing it, mostly because he hid it from me. For quite some time, I was skep­ti­cal of him.

But I decided at that moment that Kee­gan was the man I wanted, and I knew that some­how we would make things work. I sat down, read­ing through the con­ver­sa­tions he had with this strange woman about me; how he talked about me to her was heart­warm­ing. I knew why he chose to have these con­ver­sa­tions with her, instead of his friends or fam­ily. She was open-minded enough that she didn’t judge him for want­ing to be happy with a woman who was 20 years younger. His friends and fam­ily were all dis­cour­ag­ing and that wasn’t what he needed or wanted to hear.

So, this is what I’m up against.” I asked him. “If I have to fight tooth and nail to prove to your friends and fam­ily that I—”

Stop right there,” he inter­jected. “You don’t have to prove any­thing to them; all you have to do is love me for who I am.” And then he kissed me gently.

I couldn’t stop smil­ing. “I can do that. I can def­i­nitely do that, but on one con­di­tion. I want to be exclu­sive. Just you and me—no one else.” I watched his expres­sion change from seri­ous to smiling.

Then that is what you shall have my love, just us against the world.”