When I first started dating my older man, only a few people knew about my May-December relationship. He is 23 years older than me, and when people find out, they tend to be very judgmental, so I usually get a lot of awkward questions. Also, I’ve been told that a May-December relationship is a recipe for trouble, which isn’t always true. People just tend to jump to conclusions because they don’t know any different. So, here are a few of the questions I frequently get asked about being with an older man. The answers are personal and a little embarrassing, but they’re completely true.
Is he rich? Are you only dating him for his money?
Honestly, how do you tell someone, who knows for a fact that your older lover has money, that you’re attracted to more than just his wallet? I’ve known my boss, who’s also my older boyfriend, for more than seven years. I know he has a great personality, comes from a good background, and can make anyone laugh. While it works in my favor that he’s generous with his money, his pockets aren’t the reason that I’m with him—it’s him as a person.
What do you have in common? He’s almost 25 years older than you.
As with all relationships, having common interests is important. People don’t understand that just because my man is older, he’s not old. We do like a lot of the same music, we like movies, and we like doing things outdoors. These are things that anyone would have in common, regardless of their age difference. We don’t need to go to Bingo with the old folks to have a good time. My older man also likes to dance, which I love. He’s very up on trends and knows how to use a computer and cell phone—that’s all I need.
What about kids—does he have or want them? Have you met his, or has he met yours? Is he even able to have any kids?
This one doesn’t apply to my older man, since he doesn’t have any children of his own. However, I do. I haven’t yet introduced the kids to him as my “boyfriend,” but a lot of people ask, “Won’t your kids think of him as a grandpa?” It’s your choice as to when and how you get them to meet. With regards to having kids together, his age doesn’t really matter. Charlie Chaplin, for example, had a child at age 73. Unlike women, men do not have limits on their fertility.
There a few other, more personal questions about why younger women are so drawn to rich, older men…