Proof That a Younger Woman Gets Treated Better When She’s Dating an Older Man

A lot of women these days are ask­ing about the con­cept of chivalry, prob­a­bly because you don’t see much of it any­more. But if you grew up in an ear­lier gen­er­a­tion, you’re prob­a­bly a lit­tle more famil­iar with the term.

Chivalry was a term used to describe knights who were loyal, cour­te­ous, pro­tec­tive, hon­or­able, and gen­tle with their women. A knight was also sup­posed to pos­sess traits like courage, humil­ity, obe­di­ence, and chastity. Knights who lived by the code of chivalry were to show self con­trol and respect toward women, as well as pro­tect the inno­cent, weak, or unarmed. They were to admin­is­ter jus­tice, avoid cheat­ing or lying, and were expected to avenge the wronged. In love, chivalry usu­ally refers to the gen­tle­manly way that a man treats a woman—doing the right things, for the right rea­sons, at the right times—like open­ing the door for her and refrain­ing from tak­ing her to bed the first chance he gets.

Chivalry def­i­nitely seems hard to come by these days, with so many women under the impres­sion that if a man is being nice to a woman, it’s only to get into her pants. As a woman in her 30s, it has been dif­fi­cult dat­ing a man who’s 23 years older, but my gentleman’s man­ners more than make up for the big age difference.

I have found it very refresh­ing to be with some­one who is used to treat­ing a woman like a princess. Most of the men I’ve dated between high school and now have no idea how to treat a lady—they don’t open doors, pay for din­ner, or even com­pli­ment you on the lit­tle things. I’m sure a lot of women have had sim­i­lar expe­ri­ences. That’s why some­times it can be hard to just accept an older man’s gra­cious or kind ways—you always feel the need to doubt his intentions.

When I talk about chivalry, I don’t mean in the sense that the man does every­thing for you, like tak­ing care of each and every bill when you go out to eat, or car­ry­ing you through the front door every night. Ladies, your inde­pen­dence is still very impor­tant. But I, as well as most women, just want a man to be cour­te­ous and to show respect to me as a woman.

Believe it or not, being cat­called and groped doesn’t count as a com­pli­ment. Older men under­stand this, and as hard as it might be for you to accept his chival­rous ways, it doesn’t take too long to get used to. Take advan­tage of it if you’re dat­ing an older man. Let him pull out your chair at din­ner and hold your hand. Let him carry your heavy bags and pick up the tab. Older men were raised dif­fer­ently then men today. Older men would be more than happy to shower you with gifts, and pay you a com­pli­ment if you’ve worn your hair dif­fer­ently or cooked a deli­cious meal. It’s OK to lav­ish in this and feel like a princess. Take pride in the fact that your man does these things for you, and show him how much you appre­ci­ate his gestures.

If you’ve never dated an older man before, or a man who knows what it means to show chivalry, you’re miss­ing out. I know in today’s times, a lot of women are used to doing every­thing them­selves and don’t think they need that from their rela­tion­ship. I used to be the same way, but now, I will never turn down my older man’s offer to carry my gro­ceries or save me from a big spi­der. All ladies deserve to be treated like a princess, and my older man knows just how to get it done.

  • Omnious­eye

    Well age isn’t nec­es­sary syn­onym of being cour­te­ous or polite­ness. I am a man and I even seen for­eign­ers vis­it­ing as tourist act like jerks to the locals and dis­re­spect women. Espe­cially if they are sex tourist. In bangkok MANY of them are over their fifties and you should lis­ten the foul lan­guage they use when they talk between them­selves about the girls. Or even how they act! Some of them take even more lib­er­ties when they are out­side because the chance of some­one they know who see them act like jerk are even slim­mer. Its like free­dom for them. And many of them keep com­ing back regularly.

    If you want to find nice guys, just meet one, and don’t be to anal about his behav­ior like the author in this arti­cle is. Being “chival­rous” is not related age, race or social sta­tus. But its related to per­sonal val­ues, per­cep­tion, per­son­al­i­ties and choices. The author seem to focus that she is appre­cia­tive of this kind of cul­ture and be fails to men­tion that those men with those rather con­ser­v­a­tive val­ues has expec­ta­tions also from the woman.

  • Tasha

    I think chivalry is not depen­dent on age gap, and how old the man is. Take for exam­ple, I am 27 years of age and recently started see­ing a man who is 34 years of age. He’s very gen­tle, treats me well and I absolutely feel like a princess. I believe whole heart­edly that he will not pur­posely do wrong by me. His actions show that much. I believe that he is the way he is because of the way he was brought up by his family. :)