QUESTION: Instead of a traditional Christmas gift this year, my sugar daddy offered to pay for any plastic surgery procedure of my choice. I’m not against plastic surgery or anything, but should I be offended?
CHELSEA SAYS: Believe it or not, your sugar daddy isn’t too much off the mark with this one. There was actually a survey recently that found that when it comes to gifts, the one thing sugar babies want most is plastic surgery. You can read more about it here. Maybe your sugar daddy just did his research?
But going back to your question, I think this is one of those things you really have to look at in context. If you’ve been complaining about something you aren’t happy with about your body, then maybe this is a gift he thinks you’ll really want, in which case, there’s no reason to feel offended. In fact, you should be happy that your sugar daddy listens to you and wants to give you a gift that makes you happy.
On the other hand, if your sugar daddy has been complaining about something, it might be more of a gift for him than for you. If this is the case, he might be trying to give you a subtle hint, and I wouldn’t blame you for feeling insulted.
If this plastic surgery gift is completely out of the blue, I can understand why you’d be confused. But if that’s the case, I don’t think he intended to offend you. If he had been specific about which procedure he wanted to gift you, say a boob job or liposuction, then I’d be a little more concerned, because that could be his way of telling you that it’s something he thinks you need to get fixed. But if he’s letting you choose what you want to do, it sounds more like an innocent gift. Besides, he knows plastic surgery is expensive, so if your sugar daddy can’t get it for you, who will?
Like I said, this really depends on the context and dynamic of your relationship. At the end of the day, you shouldn’t have to change for him just because he wants you to. So, if it really makes you uncomfortable, or if you feel like your sugar daddy doesn’t appreciate you for who you are (or what you look like), then talk to him about it. Just tell him politely that you appreciate the gift, but it’s just not something you see yourself using right now. If he really cares about you, he’ll understand. If he doesn’t understand, well, then you kind of have your answer.
TRENT SAYS: In days of yore, a sugar baby might be happy finding a tennis bracelet or a pair of Christian Louboutin shoes wrapped under the Christmas tree. But those simpler days are gone. Today, more and more women are asking for plastic surgery.
Last year, plastic surgeons performed 14.6 million procedures in the U.S. alone. That represents an 85% increase from a decade ago. And, thanks to our obsession with looks, I doubt those numbers are going to fall any time soon.
Now, granted it sounds like you didn’t ask for any procedures, so that raises a couple issues. Maybe your sugar daddy overheard you saying something about your appearance, and in an effort to show he’s listening, decided to gift you a facial peel, Botox, or plastic surgery instead of the traditional bottle of wine or lingerie?
On the other hand, there is the chance you didn’t say anything and you are quite happy and content with the way you look. In this case, you can politely tell him thanks, but no thanks. Or, go out on a limb and ask him if there’s something he thinks you should change about yourself. If he’s smart, he’ll say no.
You could tell him you’d rather exchange that gift for something else. Price out a boob job and transfer his kindness to another store of your choosing.
In the end, it’s the thought that counts. Sadly, that saying gets misinterpreted. It doesn’t mean, “Hey, at least I thought of something.” No! It means, “I know you well enough that I thought of something that shows you I’m listening and you will appreciate.”
So, in the end, I’d say, don’t be offended. But don’t be afraid to trade it in if you’d like.