As I walked across the stage at my graduation, I could sort of hear my mom talking to my older man, Keegan. She purposely chose to sit right next to him, so that she could say what he needed to hear as he watched me accept my degree. I could see his eyes lighting up as she talked and he put two and two together.
His friends were doing him a serious disservice by trying to talk him out of dating me, especially having no experience with an age gap relationship. The only experience they were going on was horror stories other people had had in the past. But hearing about a few positive age-gap relationship stories from my mom really seemed to strike a chord with Keegan.
I was finally finished with school. I had earned my degree and landed an awesome job making really good money. Professionally, life would be wonderful, as I soon learned right after the graduation ceremony. Keegan and I went to my favorite Italian restaurant to celebrate. It’s a pricey place to eat, but the food is fabulous.
We still hadn’t gotten back together yet—we had broken up because he was still dating other people—but we were talking more regularly now. The day of my graduation was also Keegan’s birthday. I asked what he wanted for his birthday and his only response was, “You.” I smiled and told him the door was unlocked whenever he wanted to come over, thinking that he meant he wanted to get laid. To be honest, I missed being with him, too.
When he arrived at my place around 10 p.m., he was fairly hammered and had walked from a small bar up the street from my apartment. I answered the door in the same black lingerie I had teased him with during our initial “10 dates, no sex” period. That took the cake. He went straight to the bathroom and then led me to the bedroom.
I took this as a good sign that I had interpreted his meaning properly. We were still raw from everything that had happened earlier that month, but I felt like that night was a step in the right direction for us as a couple. We were finally having sex again, and a lot of it. We were pretty much inseparable again after that night.
I would learn later that he had still been casually seeing one woman from the dating web site, but not until I had embarrassed myself yet again after Valentine’s Day. Our Valentine’s Day was the first I’d ever actually spent with my partner. We exchanged cards, flowers, and most importantly, time. Keegan was the most patient, careful, tender, and loving man I had ever been with, and I thought that it was time for us to take the next step into securing our monogamous state, considering the dust had finally settled from our recent split.
It was about a week before my birthday when I asked him out to dinner. After we had ordered our drinks, I looked him square in the eye and said, “I would like for us to be exclusive, in a monogamous relationship that we can both agree will eventually lead to marriage and children.”
Keegan choked on his drink. By the time he caught his breath, the waitress had come back for our orders and he gave me the, “Hold on a minute” gesture while placing his order. I placed my order and then waited for his answer…