My life was blissful; every day felt as if I was floating. Between my two sugar daddies, I was having my cake and I was eating it, too. I had two men that loved me and from what it seemed, Kirk was being faithful, and as far as Keith was concerned, I was a princess in his eyes.
The fact of the matter was that I was young and my relationship with my older man, Keith, although exciting, made me feel like I was growing up too fast. I felt like a wife and I wanted to explore a bit more; it was just too much of a commitment to someone who had already lived his life and experienced what he needed to. My life with Keith was becoming too much of a routine. That’s why I needed my second sugar daddy, Kirk.
Kirk and I had arguments, heated ones that would usually end in crazy wild sex. We would be random and stop in the middle of the night during long country trips and have sex right there in the open country air. That sort of spontaneous behavior excited me. He was gorgeous to look at naked and the fact that he had a successful career made him even more appealing. I used to love watching him walk in front of me while women stared and I used to tell him to speak to them and take their numbers, just to see the power he had. When we’d get back to his place, we would have crazy sex and talk dirty about the women he met.
Keith’s absence—he was in England with his wife most of the time—gave me the freedom to roam around with Kirk and I was not hiding him. We had both kept our relationships private from our parents, as families tend to complicate things and make them more official. That all changed when Kirk finally suggested I meet his mom, dad, and sisters, which I was not very keen on doing. But I agreed.
Mothers can be quite judgmental when it comes to their sons; no one is ever good enough, and when I met Keith’s mother, that’s exactly how I felt. She later apologized and confessed to me that Kirk was always wild, so she made it her duty to stay away from his women, since they never lasted; he always had a new one every week. She thought I was just another one of his flings and she didn’t want to form a bond with anyone he wasn’t going to keep around.
She and I eventually grew close and Keith and I often went to her home for dinner. In fact, we got so close that when he and I had issues in our relationship, she was the first person I turned to.
During this time, I think my relationship with Keith was being ignored mentally. We stayed in contact and I showed no signs of my affair with Kirk, but mentally, I wasn’t there. I had gotten so accustomed to the lifestyle I had with Keith and I felt such a strong sense of obligation to him that I did not want to let him go. I wanted them both; they both had their purpose in my life. As horrible as I may sound, I do have a conscience and I didn’t want to hurt Keith. He had invested a lot of time and money, not to mention his heart, in me. So, I continued to pursue my double life as long as I could. Unfortunately, it would eventually catch up to me.