What I Did When I Had to Choose Between My Sugar Daddy and My Husband: Part 2

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t sad about the sit­u­a­tion I had got­ten myself in. Some days it was hard for me to even get out of bed and go to work. More than any­thing, I missed my hus­band. I felt guilty about what I had done to our mar­riage, and that I had hurt him more than he even knew.

In the mean­time, I worked on my self-healing and self-love. Over time, I real­ized how big of a role I had played in push­ing my hus­band to his lim­its. While I made no excuses for his actions, and believed that he crossed the line because of his lost power, I could now accept my part in the sit­u­a­tion. I also real­ized that, instead of work­ing on my mar­riage, I checked out and found a dis­trac­tion that only made my mar­riage worse. My mar­riage was falling apart not because of him, or me, but because of both of us—we both made mis­takes and I was finally ready to accept that.

Dur­ing my sep­a­ra­tion, one of my friends told me some­thing that really stuck with me. She said, “You know the say­ing that the grass is always greener on the other side? Well f*ck that! Any­time you find your­self envy­ing the grass on the other side, you bet­ter step out­side of your house and turn on the water. Start water­ing your own grass and I bet you it’ll get greener.” She was right. Instead of invest­ing more time in my mar­riage, I invested more time in my affair and began to neglect my hus­band. I real­ized that I wanted things to work out with Robert, my hus­band. So, the next morn­ing, I finally picked up the phone.

When he answered the phone, he did not say hello. Instead, he said, “Thank God you called. I’ve missed you so much. Please just come home.” I was so happy to hear him say those words.

In three months, I had real­ized who really mat­tered to me. I had made a com­mit­ment to a man who had the strength to stand before our friends and fam­ily and promise to love me for­ever. This was a man who stood by me when I needed him and who let me go when I needed to find myself. That night, I packed my bags and went home to my husband.