What I Did When My Older Man Told Me I Couldn’t Go Out with My Friends

Sugar Daddy Sean “P. Diddy

I moved in with my older man shortly before we became engaged. Our age gap rela­tion­ship was great; we got along together well, with only a minor dis­agree­ment here or there. That is until seven months after I moved in, when a night of cel­e­brat­ing with girl­friends turned into my first night away from home.

“Noth­ing good hap­pens after mid­night,” my older man said to me when I told him I was meet­ing my younger girl­friends after work to cel­e­brate my job. It is one of his favorite quotes about stay­ing out too late, and he truly believes that most bad things you hear about in the news—car acci­dents, drunk dri­ving, and so on—happen after midnight.

He is easy­go­ing, but at times, he can be unre­al­is­tic about what he believes hap­pens when my girl­friends and I get together. In his imag­i­na­tion, there are young, smoking-hot men flock­ing around us, try­ing their best to pick us up.

The night began with a small group of us cel­e­brat­ing in a classy hotel bar, and it evolved into a night of bar-hopping mer­ri­ment, which ended at a neigh­bor­hood bar just blocks away from where my father lived. Since I left my car at the first bar down­town and I was not able to drive any­way, my girl­friend dropped me at my father’s house. I called my older man at 2:30 a.m. to tell him I had too much to drink and couldn’t drive home. In my mind, I thought I was doing the respon­si­ble thing, and besides, I was at my father’s home.

When I awoke the next morn­ing and my head was clearer, I remem­bered call­ing my older man, but not what he had said. I phoned home again to tell him I had no car, and he said, “I guess you’ll just have to fig­ure it out on your own,” and hung up.

Despite my best inten­tions, my older man was pissed. He is not the type that yells or argues; silence is his method of com­mu­ni­cat­ing anger. When I got home, he wouldn’t look at me or speak to me. I received the cold shoul­der for days.

He told me, in no uncer­tain terms, we were in a rela­tion­ship and stay­ing out all night was, quite sim­ply, not appro­pri­ate. The appro­pri­ate thing to do would be not to drink so much that I wasn’t able to drive home. And, he was right.

Unfor­tu­nately, any­time after that night that I told him I was going out with my girl­friends, my night away from home was brought up and became the “scar­let let­ter” I wore for at least a year. I worked very hard to earn his trust back by always show­ing up on time with a smile on my face and a big hug for him.

While I do still go out with my girl­friends occa­sion­ally, I rarely stay out past mid­night. Being in an age gap rela­tion­ship with an older man means you learn to respect his beliefs and value sys­tems, even if it means the party’s over by 12:00 a.m. And sadly, a few years later, I learned how cor­rect his say­ing “noth­ing good hap­pens after mid­night” is, when one of my best friends was killed by a drunk dri­ver while on her way home after a very late night out with friends.

  • mane­stro

    Sounds like a won­der­ful rela­tion­ship. Who wouldn’t want to be pun­ished for an entire year because they drank a lit­tle too much one night and stayed out past mid­night? I bet most women would be thrilled to have their part­ner refuse to pick them up late at night when they were too drunk to drive. This girl has daddy issues.

    • Reg­u­lar Guy

      Act like a child, get treated like a child. For­tu­nately, she put her big girl panties on and learned the les­son she was taught.

  • trey

    Great story. Its called respect­ing your­self and your part­ner. I wish more peo­ple under­stood con­siquences like the author. An emense amount of respect to this story.

  • Reg­u­lar Guy

    This young lady has gained wis­dom and matu­rity. It’s called grow­ing up, and she’s doing it well.