Why Do Younger Women Date Older Men?

The idea of younger women dat­ing older men is a time­less con­cept. But why? Why do younger women like dat­ing older men, and why has this con­ven­tion been prac­ticed for so long? The age-old ques­tion has been pon­dered by anthro­pol­o­gists, soci­ol­o­gists, psy­chol­o­gists, behav­ioral sci­en­tists, talk show hosts, high school girls at slum­ber par­ties, and younger men walk­ing home alone after clos­ing time.

Is it an innate evo­lu­tion­ary tac­tic for the woman to find the strongest, most con­fi­dent man who can finan­cially sup­port her and pro­vide her (if she so chooses, thank you very much) with genet­i­cally supe­rior children?

If so, older men come out on top every time. After all, what’s more attrac­tive? Is it an eager, younger guy, fresh out of col­lege, who’s self­ish in bed and who has noth­ing but hope to cling to, or an older, wiser, out­go­ing, more mature man with a great job, who also hap­pens to be expe­ri­enced and self­less in bed?

Evo­lu­tion­ar­ily, it’s the per­fect match. Younger women like men who can pro­vide emo­tion­ally and finan­cially. And, luck­ily for those women, older men are visual creatures.

For younger women want­ing to date older men and older men look­ing to date younger women, the evo­lu­tion­ary dimen­sion pro­vides a good start. But not all rela­tion­ships are that sim­ple, because women and men are often a lit­tle more mul­ti­di­men­sional than that.

So maybe there’s more to sex­ual chem­istry than biol­ogy. Maybe sex­ual chem­istry is related to the size of the man’s wal­let. After all, some younger women don’t want a sex­u­ally charged older man; some younger women pre­fer a man who can shower her with Birkin bags and fill her closet with Manolo Blah­nik shoes. In fact, there are prob­a­bly many younger women who pre­fer that, and, lucky for them, there are a lot of afflu­ent older men who are more than happy to shower these women with the finer things. And why shouldn’t they? Con­sent­ing adults can date and marry for dif­fer­ent reasons.

At the same time, most peo­ple would be hard-pressed to find exam­ples of beau­ti­ful young women dat­ing poor older men with lim­ited finan­cial means.

Nat­u­rally, gold­dig­ging is a con­di­tional arrange­ment that can be short-lived. After all, older men will only hold onto their arm candy so long as it pleases them. They have noth­ing to lose, because they can always find another young woman to date.

If, how­ever, the ‘who’ is more impor­tant than the ‘what’, then maybe age really is just a num­ber. And the attrac­tion runs deeper than any­thing biol­ogy or mate­r­ial pos­ses­sions can explain. And, in such cases, you’re deal­ing with all the lit­tle nuances that make the younger woman dat­ing an older man sce­nario just like any other relationship.

The biggest issue in one of these rela­tion­ships will likely be the recur­ring need to explain to oth­ers that your rela­tion­ship is actu­ally based on love and admiration—and noth­ing insincere.

Yes, you’ll end up deal­ing with the mind-numbing responses like, “He’s just a father fig­ure to you!” And that may be true. But tell me this: is it even pos­si­ble to be in a rela­tion­ship that doesn’t have some sort of psy­cho­log­i­cal undertone?

He’s mak­ing you miss out on the fun of being in your twen­ties!” You might say that to a young woman in a rela­tion­ship with a more mature man. But would you say that to a guy in his twen­ties who wanted to marry his older girl­friend? Prob­a­bly not.

He’s going to die long before you do.” And that’s most likely true, but it’s the rea­son why a younger woman would rather spend all her time with her older man than suf­fer a sec­ond with­out him.

Some­times, older is bet­ter. With age comes expe­ri­ence, which is why many younger women will always want to date older men.