Why Everything They’ve Told You About Marriage Is Wrong

The idea of liv­ing together before mar­riage has always been a hot topic. A lot of sugar babies, even some of the real-life women who share their sto­ries on EarnTheNecklace.com, have lived with their sugar daddy before mar­riage was ever part of the dis­cus­sion. It’s def­i­nitely a grow­ing trend; in fact, two thirds of peo­ple will live together before walk­ing down the aisle.

There seems to be this con­cep­tion that if you move in together before mar­riage, you’re more likely to get a divorce—there have even been stud­ies show­ing the link between pre­mar­i­tal cohab­i­ta­tion and divorce. But new research is prov­ing otherwise.

A new report pub­lished in the Jour­nal of Mar­riage and Fam­ily explains that there actu­ally is no dif­fer­ence in the divorce rates between cou­ples who live together before mar­riage and those who wait till after mar­riage to move in together.

The soci­ol­o­gist behind the research stud­ied national sur­veys from three sep­a­rate years and gath­ered mar­riage, divorce, and cohab­i­ta­tion data on over 7,000 peo­ple. Upon study­ing the find­ings, they found no real link between mov­ing in before mar­riage and the divorce rate. But they did find another fac­tor that influ­ences the like­li­hood of main­tain­ing a long-term rela­tion­ship. Cohab­i­ta­tion doesn’t lead to divorce; it’s when you move in together that’s really the decid­ing factor.

Accord­ing to their find­ings, mov­ing in after the age of 23 will increase your chances of a suc­cess­ful mar­riage after­wards; one econ­o­mist even believes that every year after 23 that you wait for mar­riage, the less likely you are to get divorced. The idea is that when you move in with some­one when you’re too young, you’re not mature enough and don’t have enough expe­ri­ence to choose an ade­quate, com­pat­i­ble life part­ner. That’s why the longer you wait, the more equipped you’ll be to pick a part­ner that will stick around for the long haul.

So, there you have it—moving in with your sugar daddy before mar­riage doesn’t nec­es­sar­ily mean you’re headed for a divorce, but you still don’t want to rush into any­thing. Before you start pack­ing your bags, make sure you know what you’re get­ting into. Spend the time get­ting to know him and only take the next step when you’re sure that you’re happy in that relationship.

What do you think: Would you want to live with your sig­nif­i­cant other before marriage?


Lus­combe, B., “How Shack­ing Up Before Mar­riage Affects a Relationship’s Suc­cess,” TIME web site, March 12, 2014; http://goo.gl/jVCEYU.

This entry was posted in From The Editors and tagged , , , on by .

About Francine K

I first met Alfred when I was 38 and he was 63, on an Internet chat site. I really didn't think this was a datable person, but a wonderful friendship developed. We became chat buddies for a while and connected so well on so many levels, we decided to meet in person. We live 100 miles apart, but that has never gotten in the way of us spending time together. A passionate relationship soon grew, and oh what an amazing lover. I had some reservations about getting too involved: our age difference is 25 years, and we are in different phases in our lives; in fact he has a daughter who is older than I am. I have 2 teenage sons, a career, was building my first home, and he’s retired, owns his home, lives alone, takes a nap during the day, and enjoys a slow-paced lifestyle. I am still ambitious and will soon have the empty nest to go start my own life, as my sons are nearly independent. There is no way I want to sit down and have a retired lifestyle yet. We’ve shared a beautiful, passionate friendship for many years together. We’ve never really figured out how to plan a future together, though.