Why I Happily Signed a Prenup Before Marrying My Older Man (and Why You Should, Too!)

Sugar Daddy Alec Baldwin and wife Hilaria Thomas

Mar­ry­ing an older man has its dis­tinct social nuances. And, there are also legal issues that come into to play, which may or may not deter­mine whether you’re in the age gap rela­tion­ship for the long haul; and for some men, these issues may also deter­mine whether or not you’re a gold-digger.

Even if you’re in love with your older man and you’re in the age gap rela­tion­ship it for all the right rea­sons, the fact remains that fre­quently an older man has had more time in his life to accu­mu­late assets than that of his much younger mate.

Some older men are cir­cum­spect in their age gap rela­tion­ships with younger women and are less will­ing to take the risk of part­ing with those assets—my man was.

Enter, cen­ter stage, the topic of prenup­tial agree­ments. The sub­ject is not one my older man and I addressed until post-engagement. With a $30,000 ring on my fin­ger, it is safe to say that at that point in our lives, he had accu­mu­lated more money than me.

Hav­ing already relin­quished nearly 30 years of retire­ment sav­ings to his for­mer wife, it did not come as a sur­prise to me when he approached the topic of a prenup. In fact, it was so expected that I don’t even dis­tinctly remem­ber the conversation.

I had always respected the pri­vacy of our finan­cial affairs and had no idea what his annual income was or what the nature of his assets were. Frankly, I had no inter­est in know­ing, because I was with him for him, not for his assets. Not to men­tion that I was gain­fully employed and earned a rea­son­able liv­ing inde­pen­dent of his wealth. But I would be lying if I said I didn’t know there were assets at play, given we were both dri­ving a Mer­cedes and enjoy­ing a com­fort­able lifestyle.

Some may be sur­prised to learn that rather than ques­tion the idea of sign­ing a prenup, I not only sup­ported it, I signed it with­out mak­ing one revi­sion to the terms. Essen­tially, it says that in the event of a divorce, what I came into our mar­riage with is what I will leave with.

It is rea­son­able that some women might view a prenup­tial agree­ment as a mea­sure of doubt, on his part, of your trust­wor­thi­ness. Are you a gold-digger, or are you really in that age gap rela­tion­ship for the love?

How­ever, I rea­soned that a prenup wasn’t a mat­ter of him not trust­ing me, but of being risk-averse and pro­tect­ing his assets in the event that things took a turn for the worse. And who could blame him? I would cer­tainly do the same if I had sub­stan­tially more assets than my partner.

Some women might bris­tle at the thought of a prenup­tial agree­ment, but why? If you love your man, do you trust him enough to take care of you no mat­ter what hap­pens? Call me opti­mistic, but I’m plan­ning for a life­time, not a divorce, so what’s a piece of paper to me?