Why It’s So Dangerous for Women in May-December Relationships to Get Drunk Around Men Their Own Age: Part 1

My best friend’s 21st birth­day was about 12 days before my wed­ding to my older man, Kee­gan. Her boyfriend and I were secretly plan­ning a birth­day bash at a local bar for her. She had been dying to wear one of my Ver­sace dresses, so I put it in my car along with a stun­ning pair of stilet­tos for her to wear. At this point, I still needed help putting together my wed­ding favors, so as an excuse to get her to come to the venue, I asked my friend to help me. When I picked her up dressed to the nines, she was imme­di­ately suspicious.

At this time, I was also tex­ting my friend from col­lege, Brian. We had fallen out of touch due to his crazy girl­friend and now that he’d ditched her, he wanted to recon­nect. So, I invited him to the party.

Well, don’t you look sexy today? Is some­thing going on or do wed­ding favors turn you on in some weird way?” asked my friend Laura apprehensively.

We need to make a few stops. Is that OK? You know, I just want to look like a hot sin­gle lady for a few days before becom­ing a mar­ried old hag,” I replied. We both laughed.

I drove us to a local bar that we both loved. Every­one yelled, “Sur­prise,” as soon as we walked in. “Drinks are on me, honey! Happy birth­day!” I said, giv­ing her a hug. “Oh, and here—this is for you,” I said, hand­ing her a gar­ment bag and the stilettos.

Is this—oh, please tell me this is the dress I have been drool­ing over for months! IT IS,” she squealed as she hopped up and down before grab­bing me for a hug.

As she went to go change, I ordered drinks and took my engage­ment ring off, slip­ping it into my purse. As Laura came back out look­ing gor­geous in the dress, I handed her my purse. “Here, there’s all of your favorite makeup inside.”

There’s a very good rea­son you are my best friend, Vivian. Thank you!” She hugged me again before rush­ing off to the bath­room to get all dolled up. As I waited for her, Brian and I con­tin­ued tex­ting back and forth. He was nearby and really wanted to see me. So I fig­ured what the hell—it wasn’t my bach­e­lorette party, but I almost felt jus­ti­fied to flirt relent­lessly with him, espe­cially after Kee­gan admit­ted to me a few days ear­lier that he had been hav­ing sex with a sugar baby until six months into our May-December relationship.

Me, Laura, her boyfriend, Brian, and about 20 other peo­ple danced our asses off that night. We drank heav­ily and laughed even harder. Brian and I were the last to leave after clean­ing up and we were both still too drunk to drive. We sat on the tail­gate of his truck just talk­ing and flirt­ing, and then the con­ver­sa­tion turned seri­ous. “Vivian, you know I have always wanted more with you. Yet, here you are, mar­ry­ing this guy who is older than both of us. I could make you happy; I could give you every­thing you need. I want you to be my wife. I want you to have my chil­dren. We would be great together yet some­how the tim­ing has never been right,” Brian said, putting his hand on my thigh.

You waited until now to make a play at me, Brian? Now, when I am less than two weeks away from my wed­ding to a man who has given me the world? That’s just not fair,” I said, almost disgusted.

Brian looked at me and just grinned mischievously—his gin­ger hair stand­ing out against his pale white skin in the moonlight…

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About Vivian

I am 26 and my husband 45. At first, our friendship existed mostly online. I was actually helping my now husband with his dating profile when it dawned on me that he was exactly what I was looking for in a perfect life partner. So, I asked him out and we have been together ever since. We now have two daughters together and everyone that knows us will tell you that they simply can’t imagine us apart, and neither can we. I’m no stranger to May-December relationships—my father was 71 and my mother was 33 when I was born. I have never dated a guy my own age. Anything less than 10 years older than me just seems wrong, and frankly, it doesn’t even turn me on in the slightest bit to think about it. It’s actually a turn-off. After going through relationships with a few rich older men, I finally settled down with my husband. I’m sure there were people waging bets on how quickly our marriage would fall apart, but we’re determined to prove them all wrong.