Why You Shouldn’t Expect Sex on Your Wedding Night

Are you plan­ning to marry your older man some­time in the near future? If a wed­ding is in the works, have you thought about your wed­ding night? A lot of brides spend hours, not to men­tion money, on the per­fect piece of sexy lin­gerie for their first night as man and wife. You’ll have a roman­tic wed­ding cer­e­mony, one hell of a recep­tion, and then your older man will carry you to the bed and you’ll have the best sex of your life. Those seem like rea­son­able expec­ta­tions, right? Well, think again, because for a lot of newly mar­ried cou­ples, wed­ding night sex couldn’t be any more disappointing.

A sur­vey of over 2,000 cou­ples who had tied the knot over the past three years revealed that more than half of them (52%) didn’t even have sex on their wed­ding night—some (17%) didn’t have sex till three days after the wedding.

Almost a quar­ter of the cou­ples who passed on wed­ding night sex said it was because the groom got too drunk. Six­teen per cent blamed the bride—she was too tired and fell asleep. Other pop­u­lar rea­sons included the bride being too drunk, hav­ing kids to tend to, or because the cou­ple got into a fight before the recep­tion wrapped up.

If you and your older man have a wed­ding com­ing up, here are a cou­ple ways to make sure wed­ding night sex isn’t a com­plete downer:

• Enjoy your wed­ding. When the big day arrives, stop stress­ing about every lit­tle detail and just enjoy it. Assign peo­ple before­hand to be in charge of things on the day of, like flower arrange­ments, setup and décor, col­lect­ing gifts, and stuff like that. If you’re more relaxed, you’re more likely to be up for sex on your wed­ding night.

• Try some­thing new on your wed­ding night. Build up the antic­i­pa­tion in the days lead­ing up to the wed­ding. Tell your older man that you have a sur­prise in store for him on your first night together as a mar­ried cou­ple, but that he’ll have to wait till then to expe­ri­ence it. At the recep­tion, remind your older man that you have some­thing in store for him—tease him, flirt with him, and make him want you right there and then. This will also help him keep the drink­ing in check.

• Set the mood. While you’re at the recep­tion, have some­one set up your room with can­dles, rose petals, cham­pagne, and what­ever else gets you and your man in the mood for sex.

• This is one of those occa­sions when morn­ing sex can really come in handy. If you’re too tired on the night of to really enjoy your older man, or if he’s too drunk, wait till the morn­ing. Wake him up with a kiss or naughty touch—you’ll prob­a­bly enjoy it more once you’ve both had some rest.

What do you think: Do you have any other tips to share about how to have the best wed­ding night sex?


Kirkova, D., “More than half of cou­ples DON’T have sex on their wed­ding night – mostly because the groom is too drunk,” Daily Mail web site, Octo­ber 9, 2013; http://goo.gl/w0megb.

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About Isabella

I was never patriotic, so when Independence Day came, the last thing on my mind was to go out and celebrate. I was bored and I was lonely, and though they weren’t my normal crowd, thesse girls were friends and family members who I grew up with. But Diana had her man, Marsha had hers, and my cousin Lisa had her own. I was the only one who was single and my taste was just too high; the kind of men they dated did not appeal to me. I wanted the executive, the entrepreneur. I was 22 and unhappy about my life. I yearned to be in a relationship; I felt I had so much to give a man, and yet I was single. My friends and I waited for cab and I was still second-guessing whether or not I really wanted to go out. While we were waiting, an older looking gentleman driving a blue pick-up truck drove up to us. As he slowed, he said, “Don’t move. I’m coming right back!” He drove off, leaving a trail of his cologne, as he sped away to drop off the construction workers sitting in the back of the truck. Literally moments later, he came back, stopped in front of us, asked us where we were going, and told us to get in. It turns out his name was Keith. After Keith dropped us off, I realized I didn’t want to stay and asked him to take me back to where he picked us up from. He turned, looked at me, and said, “You were the reason why I picked you all up. I wanted to get to know you. So, I’m happy you decided to leave with me.”